how can it be im so undeveloped and vicious and toxic

dude dude dude its happening im having a capstone meeting scheduled im gonna finish im gonna graduate im gonna go to a phd duuuuuude

why do I feel so guilty for asking things

things work out and im actually good at what i do and I notice novel things and can fight for and express them :)

try not to crash out challenge failed

I've forgotten what it's like to be loved by people... to have them show you yourself through their eyes... that was nice

time change nice, I love daylight... time change evil, I'm so sleepy...

not my fault that my capstone hasn't moved yippeeeee

oh yeah yeah just cried in the department head's office (he started talking about how what I'm feeling is bc I have to start moving on)

local bitch guilty bc doesnt know how to say no but also doesnt know when to say no (am i in my own way or should i try)

staring at my phd acceptance letter like it'll go away at any minute

the snow that's icy and crunchy and feels like it kinda sticks to your shoes to the ground.... mmm

Once again pissed people can't see inside my head and I can't make my thoughts intelligible enough

got another rejection <3 time for the self-loathing to kick in

This waking up early shit and having plans is crazy what do you mean I've fucked off for four hours and it's only noon

this shit's fire (but the fire is a dumpster fire)

writing the most hot garbage and trying not to sob my eyes out because im so fucked

Shoutout to the guys who asked if I had a lighter. I don't bc i carry the cigarettes and my friends the lighter but I appreciate the clock

The warmth and comfort of seeing an elevator at 7 already like "omg a friend is hereeee"

on my puter where i will fuck off and do nothing but i could be asleep on a man right now instead >:(